Connecting

I have been working with a Clinical Trials company assesing subjects (people) over the phone for depression to qualify them for a Major Depression Med. Most sound depressed, some more than others. Some answer the Hamilton Depression scale with a bright affect (happiness in their voice), but answer the questions with a score that define they have depression, I atribute that to a possible good day when I called them.
One woman I called was on the verge of tears throughout the call. She was going through significant traumas in her life and as she described so well, was having trouble feeling like life was worth living. When I do the depression section of the scale I ask the person if they had thought of suicide, and if so, when was the last time. Most say they have not considered it, others state the last time was several years ago. This woman stated she thought of dying last week.
I asked her to elaborate on this and describe the intensity of the feeling and how far did the thoughts go, i,e., was it a passive thought such as "I don't care if I live or die," or did she think of ways to end her life? This woman at the moment choked up with tears said she thought of taking some pills and 'falling asleep.' Throughout her conversation she mentioned Alcoholics Anonymous and how the groups had given her a sense of family and belonging, but she had stopped going years ago.
I asked her why she had stopped. She stated that she tends to ramble on when she talks and feels embarassed by this. Slowly she pulled away from the groups, from her friends and from everyone in general. Entering into this study was a courageous thing for her. She was crying out for help and reached out in a unique way, causing her to be on the phone with me.
I suggested that when she finds herself talking too much and feeling uncomfortable, to apologize for talking too much to the person(s) and let them talk. I said that if she continues to do this, she will begin to learn where that comfort place is in her converaation and begin to learn how to converse in more of a two-way style.
She said she liked this idea and thanked me for the suggestion. I also stated that I heard her talk about AA several times, that maybe she needs to reenter AA and find a group she is comfortable in and begin to open up in meetings and hopefully find friends and possibly a sponsor.
Her verbal affect seemed to brighten a little when she said she enjoyed talking with me and bid me to have a good day. She did qualify for the study and hopefully she finds a meeting she can find her voice in again